S.C. Dixon-ary

Sometime back during one of our inebriated “salon” round-table sessions at Smitty’s Pub, I said something quite facetiously that brought a enthusiastic laugh to those present at the time, but that has since seemingly taken on a small life of its own.

Last week a friend presented me with a bumper sticker that simply says, “ANNEX MEXICO!” It seems that my little tease made some sense to him.

Firstly the idea would not be any sort of military exercise. The annexation of Mexico could be brought ‘round almost immediately and without a shot being fired by simply putting the following proposal on a national ballot to the citizens of Mexico:

“Vote Si or No: Would you like your country to be added as a full-fledged member to the United States of America with full state’s rights?

“In doing so you would automatically become bona-fide citizens, you and your families will be eligible for all of the benefits due to citizens of the United States of America and will be entitled to the rights and privileges thereof. By voting yes you also agree to undertake the responsibilities of American citizenship and will be liable for taxation, military service, and all of the rest of the obligations currently expected of citizens of American states. Citizenship in the United States means that the Government owes protection to the Citizen. Along with the rights and privileges and protection afforded the Citizen is an obligation on the part of the Citizen to owe allegiance to the government. As former citizens of Mexico you would be entitled to all of the protection, rights, and responsibilities provided by the Constitution of the United States of America.” (more…)

03.24.06

Greetings:

Concerning Christopher White Walker’s editorial, “No Direction From Washington” of March 22’s Gazette on the subject of immigration:

First let me say that I am all for immigration. America was built on the backs of immigrants. What many Americans object to is illegal immigration.

There were demonstrations across America just this past week by thousands of people who are in the United States illegally. One of their pet slogans was “We are not criminals.”

Well, in actual fact, of course they are. They have committed a breach of U.S. federal law and probably the laws of several states along the way. The idea that one can knowingly violate the law and not by nature be a criminal is nonsensical. Synonyms and definitions of the word “illegal” are “criminal, illicit, illegitimate, prohibited and unlawful. Committing or perpetrating an act in violation of the law.”
Anyone here illegally is, factually and by definition, a criminal.

Another salient point is the oft repeated phrase “Many immigrants come to this country to do jobs that Americans don’t want to do”. (I have also heard it repeated a little differently indicating that these are jobs Americans won’t do.)

Either way it’s said it’s not exactly true, or at least it needs some qualification.

These people are doing jobs Americans “won’t” do for a dollar or two or three per hour. I know a couple of friends of mine who are looking for work and are willing do just about any sort of labor…for a fair and living wage. They make the argument that by doing unskilled jobs at cute-rate prices illegal immigrants are actually hurting the work force, not helping it.

Regardless, the idea of rewarding people who break the law by offering perks such as a discounted education is inherently offensive to many Americans.

An American family without health insurance probably does not look kindly upon illegals who often take advantage of policies that provide them with what amounts to free health care.

A friend of mine summed it up succinctly during a conversation about Governor Sebelius when he said, “What part of illegal doesn’t she understand?”

The point is this: No one has to come to American illegally. America has reasonably friendly immigration laws (positively inviting, compared to those of Mexico…) Hundreds of thousands of people immigrate to this nation every year and do so without breaking the law. (The Department of Homeland Security statistics indicates over 900,000 came legally in 2004 alone.)

If anyone deserves and extra bit of help it is them, not those who choose to make their own rules while breaking ours.

(Here’s a little missive from 2005, with an updated addendum at the end…)

Yesterday, September 15, 2004, is a day that will live in infamy. Well, probably not, but it sounds pretty dramatic to say so. It worked for FDR.

I spent the morning dealing with a particular cellular phone company called Alltel. (For my friends receiving this in Europe, if you don’t have Alltel yet, there is still time to save yourselves…)

I’ve been a customer of theirs for some years, at least five, possibly much longer than that. It’s something I try not to dwell on. It makes me sad, somehow.

Even though I use may cell phone no more than 3 or 4 times a week, Alltel has still managed to make every experience one to remember. (I’ve tried, believe me, I’ve tried, but I just can’t seem to forget…)

Alltel is something of an icon to me, in that they are representative of all that I find wrong with corporate America.

• They have no respect for their clientele and, the infuriating thing about that is that they simply don’t care. (They will tell you that quite candidly, off the record, just before they “inadvertently” cut you off).
• They have a voracious appetite for income but apparently have not made the fundamental (and fiscally vital) connection that clients = income. Ergo, disgruntled clients = a loss of income. Crude, rude, and arrogant agents, however, represent overhead. Pretty basic stuff, I know, having run my own (admittedly) small business for 31 years.
• They are stunningly inept without exception and, again, without any particular concern for it. If you have to telephone them on any given issue, assume you will have to call them at least once more, more likely two or more additional calls will be necessary. They probably count on the fact that a great many folks will simply give up.
• Here’s the kicker: They KNOW that they’re inept but don’t seem to be even remotely bothered by it, which I suppose is a refreshing attitude so long as you personally have no dealings with them.
• In many areas they are the only game in town. They know this and they want you to know it as well. If you make them mad they will take their ball and go home. Naa-na-nah-nah-nah!

Having been subjected to their incompetence and their corresponding attitude pertaining to such for years, I now try to act preemptively. So it was that, more than a month ago, I notified them that the expiration date on my company credit card had changed and the change would go into effect this past September 1^st.

(We had to go to auto-pay program in an effort to stop the monthly routine of sending them a check, then, a week or two later, getting a nasty-gram from them saying that if we didn’t issue a check within 48 hours that they would suspend our telephone service and kill our chickens.

(In turn I would call them, spend a half an hour or more on hold, selecting from voicemail menus, trimming my nails, pressing my trousers, flossing, darning my socks, and being shuttled from one “representative” to another until eventually I would reach that magical someone who would say, “Why, yes, Mr. Dixon, you simpering dolt, your check arrived and cleared nearly two weeks ago! What is your problem and why are you bothering me on my break?” {The implication being that I was just being silly and had only called them up to start a quarrel, as I obviously had nothing better to do.})

Any-hoo, on my way to work that auspicious morning, I tried to call Paula to remind her of this or that which she’d asked me the night before not to let her forget, but which of course I had, at least until I was on my way to work and it had occurred to me. Ergo, one of the few reasons I have for owning a mobile phone.

Oddly enough, when I keyed in my home number it would instead automatically call Alltel! I was pretty impressed with this until I realized that I wasn’t actually calling Alltel.

This happened several times more before I dimly recalled someone once telling me that this is corporate modus operendi when they’ve suspended service.

“You wanna call somebody, you bloody deadbeat? FAT CHANCE! Ha-ha-ha-HA!” (more…)

See update, February 16,2007